How I Cheated, Lied & Held Secrets For The Marriage Proposal

Posted on August 29, 2012 by krisandro

As early as 2011, I’ve been thinking of ways to propose to Ruifang and I finally decided on how to do it about 5 weeks before the marriage proposal date on 18^th August 2012.

There hasn’t been a doubt that she will say “Yes” to marrying me as I do believe that I speak for the both of us when I say that we have a rock-solid relationship. In fact, we did the Singaporean thing by applying for a HDB flat way before the proposal. That is part of the reasons why I wanted to make this a big proposal so that she deservingly feels the romance despite the realities of getting a flat at an opportune time.

She had been hinting and sometimes even half threatening me about asking for her hand and her friends will nod their heads furiously in agreement about her readiness for marriage. I knew that she will expect it if I didn’t plan this correctly so I had to throw multiple bluffs/lies at her.

“We are going to get married anyway, so why do I need to ask?”

She knows that I don’t really believe in marriage so it was easy to plant the idea that I won’t ever propose since there’s no point to it. 2^nd August is our anniversary so I purposely planned the marriage proposal date to be after that.

I knew her very well so I manipulated her into thinking that it was her idea at the very start to model for my fake project for Oasia Hotel. I just said that my “client” needed non-professional models for a corporate online video and she almost immediately volunteered herself and her two great friends, Josephine and Reena. This set-up ensures that she will be filmed for the whole time without the need to hide cameras. Using this approach, it was also easier for me to set up meetings and arrange for logistics for the video shoot. It was half the truth after all.

Josephine Ruifang Reena 490x326

Josephine & Reena were let in on the plan and they took it upon themselves to bring Ruifang on a roller-coaster ride of emotions as they pretended to be disinterested or have cold feet about the video shoot from time to time. They were also the one who managed to get her ring size for me. At one point in time, Ruifang was so angry at Reena for having cold feet that I felt really bad but I had to pretend to be all business like.

Ruifang and I live together at her parents place so communications was the biggest worry for me. We don’t look at each others phones but we know each of our passwords to them and to our email/social accounts. My iPhone was also a huge concern with the pop-ups of text and emails and I didn’t want to hide them to arouse suspicion.

I created a new email address and found a way to lock specific apps with a special way to unlock them so that there is no way of her stumbling onto the emails. Communications with Oasia Hotel, MINI Habitat (Story here), JannPaul Diamonds & all our friends and relatives were almost all done exclusively on that channel.

The biggest challenge of it all was to get 40 relatives and friends to attend the proposal without her finding out at all. Two weeks before the actual date, I contacted the guests and set very specific instructions to where and what time they may arrive at the 22nd floor of Oasia Hotel. An accidental text or Freudian slip from any of them could have foiled the whole plan but everything went well despite a few hiccups. I still had many sleepless nights though.

There were other bluffs I threw like having a staff at the hotel send her an official email of work engagement, casually looking around at ring designs to show that I have not even bought one and asking friends to check if she had plans for the proposal date.

The Marriage Proposal Day

I barely slept for 3 hrs but I knew I was in good hands for the video and photo coverage with Derek Foo, Song and Melvin Ho leading the shoot. After doing a “car scene” at the hotel, I pretended to leave for another event so Ruifang and the crew went upstairs while I waited at the lobby till they are in the room.

My Mum & Aunt came too early and spotted Ruifang from afar and headed in the opposite direction. Later, I was extremely lucky to catch them before they went up. I also had another group of friends who drove by too early and amazingly, Ruifang found the car familiar but did not think that it was her friends in it.

I wanted the beauty of the sunset for her walk-in but the clouds didn’t help me that day. Nonetheless, it was fair weather and I am grateful for that.

She took a lot of time before she realised what was going on and at my sight of her reddening eyes, I couldn’t help but teared uncontrollably even before she stepped onto the platform where I was.

I did plan what to say but my mind was blank and I could only say what I really meant while struggling hard to not choke on my own tears. The premise was simple; Love before marriage. Marriage is empty without Love but Love is never empty without marriage.

Our vows were taken before marriage and that is “to Love and Honour each other till the end of our lives.”

I am thankful for all the extra miles that Oasia Hotel put in to ensure a smooth execution. I have countless queries from friends on where the venue was and how pretty it is. The venue is perfect for ROMs and small weddings. (Contact for the Oasia Hotel here.)

I am thankful for all the relatives and friends who had to keep such a big secret and act along.

I am thankful for the wonderful photos that Melvin took (My future bro-in-law). He not only captured wonderful moments of the both of us but also of my guests. (Melvin’s Facebook Page, Melvin’s website.)

I am thankful for the expertise of Derek and Song who refined upon my ideas for the video and added so much more dimensions and story telling to it. (Derek’s Facebook Page)

I am especially thankful for finding a woman like Ruifang and her appreciation for all the little things that I do for her.

This “big” thing was my gift for my fiancée, my dear Ruifang.

We Are Engaged!

Posted on August 19, 2012 by krisandro

It has been a nerve-racking 5 weeks of conceptualising, planning, meetings, secretive emails/texts, lying and living in fear of being exposed but it all turned out imperfectly perfect at the end.

Ruifang and I are now engaged!

It might have been overly elaborate but her joy and appreciation of it all was all worth it. (she’s still crying happy tears now and then.)

At least 50 people were involved and I owe it all to the folks at Oasia Hotel, Josephine & Reena (Ruifang’s two best friends), Melvin Ho (Photography), Derek & Song (Videography), MINI Habitat, and all the loved ones and good friends who made time to come for the big surprise. It wouldn’t have worked out if not for the fact that everyone did what was asked and more than I wished for.

There’s a lot of details but in short, Ruifang was tricked into thinking that she was doing a corporate video for the hotel. While she was happily being a “model” (and totally oblivious), family, friends and I were waiting for her at the beautiful 22nd floor to give her an unforgettable surprise.

No stress to Derek and Song but I can’t wait for the video so that I can explain everything in detail and not forgetting about the gorgeous engagement ring I bought from JannPaul Diamonds.

Meanwhile, Melvin has already did a quick video of stills which I adore for all the emotions he captured of our guests.

Link to Video

Thanks for all the well wishes on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram & texts! I am trying to thank everyone properly but it’s overwhelming for now and I do apologise if I missed anyone out.

Till later!

WAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA no more…

Posted on July 11, 2012 by krisandro

While I was cleaning up the codes for this blog, I had to go through quite a lot of old entries dating as far back as 2008 and the amount of cringe I had while reading them almost had me shuddering like it was winter. Thank goodness I lost the entries between 2004 to 2007.

My signature back then.. *cringe*

I never had the habit of keeping a journal so I guess this is the closest I can get to reading my own immature thoughts and writings. Unlike a private journal, everything is public here and I’d admit that it was very tempting to delete some of those entries but I didn’t. As horrible as it is, that history is part of me and who the hell wants to look through old entries except me anyway…

DON’T YOU DARE!

Apart from the horrible presentation and feeble attempts of self-deprecating humour, I fondly remember the memories of trying really hard to be heard in the social space. Of course I still want to be heard. Anyone who produces content on a public social platform wants to be heard by many and be loved by most. Apart from trolls of course. Trolls feed on negativity.

I feel a little rusty from the lack of writing full length posts but I hope that all the copywriting and reading over the last 2 years will help me ease back in this neglected route.

Some old readers of mine will probably miss the old style of mine but trust me. Transformer cartoons stayed awesome in my head until I tried to watch them recently.

The Four Letter Word That Starts With “A”

Posted on July 9, 2012 by krisandro

Contrary to popular belief, I did have rather good and smooth looking skin back then you know. I clearly remember the strange and sudden outbreak when I was 17/18 years of age. Strange because I had already went through a round of puberty when I was 15/16. Sudden because in a matter of weeks, the clear face of mine turned into a map of pus-filled acne clusters that threatened to erupt at any time.

The suddenness of it all had me doing everything but the right thing. I woke up with blood and pus stained pillow sheets. I pop the “ripe” ones that fly like missiles onto the bathroom mirror. I buy over the counter acne creams that does little for my problems. I buy facial washes for “acne-prone” skin that does nothing but worsen my skin condition when my skin dries out.

I can’t remember whose golden suggestion it was but after a year of World War III on my face, I finally sought proper help at the National Skin Centre in Singapore. The waiting time was horribly long but it was well worth it. The doctor made a few injections on a few large coin-sized pulsating pus-mountains of doom and I started to look hideous; which was a marked improvement from grotesque.

I also started on a year long oral medication of Isotretinoin which was a real life saver. I stopped having acne and pimples even a few years after I stopped taking the drug. It had a few side effects like sun-sensitive skin, dry lips, light wallets (damn bloody expensive drug) and quite the list of scary ones that I hope I didn’t get but it was better than what I was facing before (pun intended).

The two main points I am trying to make are these:

Seek (professional) help.

Don’t rely heavily on over-the-counter drugs/creams/wash. There are some that I personally recommend but it’s best to just head to a good dermatologist to help you with the acne.

If you want to ask advice from friends, DON’T ask those who always has blemish-free skin. It’s like asking war advice from a shiny armoured general who has not ever been in a fight.

Don’t pop the acne/pimples.

It’s the simplest advice but you know it when I say it’s the hardest damn thing to follow. No self-aware individual will want to meet fellow humans with a huge pulsating zit on his/her nose and much less with many ripe ones all over.

So what do you do? Pop it? Unless you have good genes or shit loads of money, acne/pimple scars will stick with you permanently so apply something and live with the pimples for possibly a few days rather than the danger of scarring after you pop them.

To bring you up to speed on my current skin condition before I dish out my product recommendations; I have multiple scars on my face and upper neck from World War III (see para 3.) I still have the occasional pimple, probably from my oily skin which would have made me a very rich man if sebum has practical uses.

The best facial wash for me after years of looking around is the Dermal Clay Cleanser by Dermalogica. It’s strong enough to have my face cleaned and most importantly, it’s mild enough to not strip my face of moisture. DO NOT buy harsh facial washes. They clean thoroughly but they leave your skin dry and irritated which makes your skin work overtime to produce more sebum. I buy it from sunnanz.com.sg as i4 is much cheaper than buying it from local shops.

I am relatively lazy with my facial upkeep; hardworking compared to nerds, lazy compared to women. I found that my skin was at it’s best when I cleanse, tone, moisturize and mask.

One really helpful product that I stopped taking because of it’s cost is the collagen drink, TenseUp EX by FANCL. Recommendations from ex-colleagues had me drinking it for a few months and after 1-2 months, the skin looks and feels so much better. The effects are not permanent so you do have to ingest it daily.

There is this awesome product that I discovered quite recently is the Nexcare Acne Patch by 3M. If it only existed 12 years ago, I might have saved myself from quite a lot of scarring. I put it on a pimple before I sleep and by the time I wake up, the miracle patch would have sucked up most if not all of the pus. I haven’t looked up on how it works but I am guessing that microscopic aliens use the patches as a landing pad and work with complex machinery to extract the pus.

This is not a sponsored post by any of the brands or products I’ve mentioned. I just want to save as many teens/adults as I can from the four letter word called Acne.