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I am a Chao Ah Beng?

Published
by
krisandro
on July 8, 2008
in My-Life
.

I was very amused since Sunday after reading dk’s post here and here. Out of nowhere, two persons by the name of Cynthia and Carl commented in his separate posts and said the following,

krisandro-is-a-chao-ah-beng

krisandro-is-a-chao-ah-beng2

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So apparently I put on shows, I play humble, I play good man, I am a hypocrite, I am a nice guy wannabe, I hide my true character and most importantly…

I am a CHAO AH BENG!!!

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I need to interrupt this post with this short message before I continue.

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WAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!!!!!!!!

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Okay, moving on…

I have to admit that ever since my grades slipped in Sec 3, I have been in classes with the most notorious chao ah bengs(C.A.B) in school. These C.A.Bs do all sorts of things from bringing pR0n to school, shouting their gang slogans (YO AH YO!) in school at the top of their lungs, fighting in and out of school, detained by police for various reasons and using drugs.

But me? I was just their classmate leh. I am the nerdy kid who was thrown into such classes and made good friends with them but stayed away from the vices. Maybe I should classify myself as a C.A.B wannabe. I did emulate their walk with arms swinging widely behind. I started to swear a lot. I took part in a gang standoff once. Basically it started with 2 gangs of kids on each side of the basketball court with the real C.A.Bs standing in the front. The kids at the back like me are those who dunno-wad-the-fug is happening kind. First, the one-to-one gang leader talk and then the shouting begins. I think the shouting and swearing takes really long because most of them are hoping the louder ones will scare the other group away. The police came really soon because of all the shouting *facepalm* and we ran away in all possible directions.

The only time I got into a fight is when I was in primary 5 when I pissed off some older kid at a playground. Wahahaha! He then got his secondary school C.A.B friends and surrounded me for a confrontation.

Kid Whom I Pissed: “HE! He is the one who bullied me!”

Gang Leader: “Eh! WHY YOU TOUCH MY BROTHER?”

Me: “I never touch him lor.”

(He then walked really close to me and towered over me who was only 1.3m in height)

“We go there to settle.”

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So I ended up at a lift lobby with 5-6 older kids surrounding me in a ring like fashion while the ‘kid-whom-i-pissed’ was in the makeshift ring with me. Kids our age don’t fight with proper styles if you know what I mean. There was more *piaks* than *bish*. After 10 mins of feminine punches and failed drop kicks, an adult came by and broke us up. I went home with a bruised forehead(because I headbutted him) and a sprained wrist. So much for fighting… HAAHAHA! But I was extremely pleased to find him at school a couple of days later with a cast on his arm.

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krisandro-the-chao-ah-beng

I do sound gruff and fierce and if I don’t make an effort to smile like an idiot, some people do percieve me as unfriendly and fierce. It also doesn’t help that I have a C.A.B face and look like I smoke 3 packs a day.

Thank you Cynthia and Carl, I had nothing to blog about until you peeps came along~

*Flutters C.A.B eyelashes and shows dimples*

34 Comments

“Say Hello to Singapore’s Top Bloggers!!!”

Published
by
krisandro
on June 20, 2008
in Events and My-Life
.

First of all, many thanks to Sabrina & Gavin for inviting me to the “Exclusive Yahoo! & LG Electronics Blogger’s Event” at Expo which happened on Wednesday. It is a first invite to an ‘exclusive blogger’ thingy for me and I really didn’t know what to expect.

I reach there right on time to only find myself waiting for almost half an hour without a familiar face in sight at 7-11. It turned out that Sabrina, Sheylara & Priss were waiting at the OTHER 7-11. We were soon joined by Yanjun and we were ushered down to the entrance of the exhibition to get our lanyards.

communicasia-yahoo-vip
VIP HOKAYS! DUNCH PWAY PWAY!

It looks all nice but Sheylara quickly pointed out to me that…..

krisandro-minus-r

WAH LAU! SPELL WRONGLY DEY!

*Facepalm*

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We were led to the LG booth and up to a platform when I saw familiar faces like Leonard and Nadnut and DK later. Nadnut was kind enough to introduce me to the rest of the other bloggers but I don’t really recognize most of them and they probably didn’t recognize me as well, so it’s okay.

WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAAA!!!

Oh, before I continue, this post is gonna be picture free as I only had my Nokia N95 with me and despite my love for the phone, it’s not going to have good pictures in such light conditions and so I didn’t take any pictures at all.

We were brought around the LG booth by this pretty LG PR manager. I think it could be her first time dealing with local bloggers and when she picked up the new LG phone to talk about it, a SWARM of bloggers whipped out their cameras and surrounded her while flashing the sight out of her. She quickly recovered her composure and talked about the phone. Problem was, her soft voice was drowned out and my interest in the product drowned away as well.

All I can say is that it was a visually appealing phone. I will only talk about it in depth if I can get my hands on one.

…..

(Awkward silence)

…

Okay. Next, we were led to an area where a humorous MC took the stage and said that a group of Korean dancers were going to perform for the crowd. At one point, he said,

“Hello everyone! Today we have Singapore’s Top Bloggers joining us today!”

I was completely shocked at this point. The MC then looked over our side and raised his voice a little.

“Singapore’s TOP BLOGGERS! Raise your hands!”

I think I subconsciously shuffled my feet AWAY from the group of bloggers as the rest of the crowd looked over at our group. The MC realized the lack of enthusiasm from the bloggers and the crowd and still managed to get the crowd to clap.

Not to put any of the bloggers there down, especially those who have much higher traffic than mine but…. “TOP BLOGGERS?”

WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

If the word ‘relatively’ is put in front. Then I think it’s true mostly. Maybe do a ‘mumble’ to make it nicer lar.

“Hello everyone! Today we have Singapore’s relatively Top Bloggers joining us today!”

The dance item was quite nice actually, so credits to LG for putting the show up.

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The next booth that we went to was more exciting for me. The Yahoo! booth. Adam Taggart who is Yahoo’s Senior Director for Product Marketing greeted us warmly and he totally captivated my attention with the way he presented himself and I can feel his excitement for the Yahoo Mobile Apps that he showed us. It’s quite a couple of products to talk about and you can visit Yahoo! Mobile’s site here to find out more. I’ve already downloaded one of the applications to my phone to test it out.

Will blog about it soon once I get familiar with the product!

OH! And Sabrina said that MrBrown and Dawn Yang came down as well. ARGH! WANTED TO MEET DAWN YANG MRBROWN SO MUCH! I AM TOTALLY INTO HER HIM. I HAD TO LEAVE EARLY! WHAT A BLOODY WASTE!!!

Meanwhile, you guys can surf to the following blogs for the coverage of the event and products and hopefully find pictures you like.

Leonard’s coverage.

Sheylara’s coverage.

13 Comments

Ban Me! I Am Worse Than Shadowfox or DeadPris.

Published
by
krisandro
on April 16, 2008
in My-Views
.

It all started off when deadpris cast a vote for ShadowFox to be banned on Ping.sg because,

“He is using the community platform, Ping.sg, to manipulate and distort and propagade views of anti-homosexuality. Don’t give me the bullshit on freedom of speech, this IS Singapore and we have very little freedom of speech here in any case. And, we do not tolerate discrimination here.”

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Unfortunately, she forgot to include a poll of sorts for people to vote and Jeff Probst wasn’t around to announce the results of the vote.

tribe-has-spoken
“ShadowFox, The Tribe has spoken….”

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“Who the hell is ShadowFox?”, I thought, while I search for his/her/it’s blog in Ping.sg. As I read through his entries, I totally understand deadpris sentiments towards his blog and her worries about;

“Do we want readers of Ping.sg (many of whom are still young and have not formed serious opinions of the world) to be brainwashed by non-factual researches and words of hatred and discrimination?”

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But seriously, there are much worse influences on Ping.sg lar. I caused a 16 yr-old kid who never heard of mIRC to download it and emulate me because of this post. Imagine if this boy grows up to become an ah-gua and ends up being discriminated by people like ShadowFox and then people like deadpris decides to cast a vote again which brings EVEN MORE TRAFFIC to ShadowFox which may cause the boy to commit suicide.

……….

….

..

Okay. Now that I have made myself pointless, it’s time to end on a happy note.

Everyone loves a BJ and it’s nice to know that great people like DK are giving out free BJs to people like simplyjean who hasn’t had one yet.

Can I have a BJ too?

Ban Who?

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12 Comments