2008 March | k r i s a n d r o

Archive for March, 2008

Remember mIRC and #CyberSex?

Published

on March 19, 2008

For all those netizens who are around my age, I am sure you all remember the good old days where we use ICQ and mIRC to socialize. ICQ is used to keep known friends but unfortunately, the former popular application has now turned into a toothpaste.

As for mIRC, it’s where the fun is! For the people who don’t know what it is, it’s an Internet Relay Chat client which allows users to connect to various servers around the world and chat with all sorts of people in various channels(Chatrooms).

One of the most interesting channels that every person had to go in for at least once would be #Cybersex. Of course it didn’t take me long for me to figure out that 98% of the people in that chatroom are actually guys and the remaining 2% of the girls are too busy trying to fend off the desperate guys.

What you may NOT KNOW about the 98% of the guys is that a small percentage of them visits the channel impersonating as females to make fun of you horny men. Like me.

Below are the screenshots of some of the conversations in #Cybersex with me pretending to be a girl called “Kristy”.

(Click on image to enlarge)

[ad]

19 Comments

What Will You Do If The National Library Chains Up Your Bicycle?

Published

krisandro

on March 18, 2008

in News-worthy

[ad]

According to the Newpaper, a man parked his bicycle outside the National Library on Saturday despite repeated warnings to not do so. Despite having wide pathways, the library personnel insisted that the bicycle poses as a hazard and told the man to park the bicycle at the designated bicycle bay on another street. The man known as Mr Bee Hee Heng ignored their warnings and left his bicycle at the pathway and returned 3 hours later to only find his bicycle chained up by the library personnel.

[Image from the Newpaper]

What would you have done at this point?

Mr Bee did what most would not do. Chain his bicycle? He chain up the National Library lor.

[Image from the Newpaper]

WAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!

A fine example of tit-for-tat. He chained only one entrance of the National Library and only removed it after the police have arrived. It is not known what punishment he got from this incident, but despite being wrong in the 1st place, I have to the SALUTE DA-MAN! Mr Bee Hee Heng, if you are reading this, you are my idol. You got BALLS!

[Image from the Newpaper]

But, please don’t pass me the $1000 fine you are potentially getting.

Ladies and Gentlemen! Learn from him!

If someone irritates you, irritate them back!

If someone scolds you, scold them back!

If someone slaps you, slap them back!

If someone gropes your butt, grope them back!

Oh wait…. that might not work……

0 Comments

My Wise Mum Said,

Published

krisandro

on March 12, 2008

in rambles

When I pay Gahmen late by 1 month, they give me fine! Why last time when I pay them 3 months in advance, I never get discount???

Well, she is not ALWAYS wise though, like that time when she nagged at advised me to tidy up my computer table. LOL.

[ad]

3 Comments

There Is Something Wrong With Your Monitor!

Published

krisandro

on March 11, 2008

in Wierd Stuffs

[ad]

According to the last 1,100 visits to my blog, the breakdown of the screen resolutions that people use are as follows:

(Click on image to enlarge)

I know I don’t attract 20,000++ views on my blog per day like Xiaxue to give a more accurate analysis but these are my observations from my website’s data.

There is ONE good news, ONE “Are You Sure?” question and ONE WTF! observation derived from the graph above.

The Good News!

40.1% of users use a screen resolution of 1280 x 1024, which accounts for the most number of users. This probably means that people are getting richer and have bigger monitors! I still remember when not too long ago, 800 x 600 was the standard!

“Are You Sure?”

3.5% of people use 800 x 600 resolutions and 0.2% of users still use 640 x 480!!!

640 x 480! Who the hell uses that resolution anymore?

My guide is as follows:

You Know You Should Upgrade Your Screen Resolution When…

1) Your “start” button looks as big as the above.

2) You need to scroll HORIZONTALLY to read my blog

3) Your 80 year old grandma is able to click on the “start” button without her glasses

4) Your 2 year old kid snatches the mouse from your grandma and clicks the button more accurately than you.

And for the final WTF! observation.

WHAT THE HELL IS “UNKNOWN” resolution?

Could it be….

“MUMMY!! STUPID KOR KOR GO AND MOVE MY MOUSE!!! See lar! Now need 20 mins to move my mouse to my maple story icon lor!”

2 Comments

“Sperm” Found in Shower Cubicle

Published

krisandro

on March 9, 2008

in Wierd Stuffs

[ad]

Having a week of gloomy, sunless afternoons for the past week or so, I was surprised to find it incredibly sunny on Saturday. I quickly grabbed my gear and went to the swimming pool at the Jurong West Sports and Recreation Centre for a tan.

Yes, yes. I am one of the people who goes to the swimming pool without swimming. Sue me…..

After tanning for an hour under the blistering hot sun, I went for the showers and into my favourite corner cubicle to only find….