Tag Archive for 'google'

You Think Search Engines Like Google Have The Answer? Think Again..

Almost everyone has traffic coming from searches made at engines such as Google and Yahoo. My blog is no different and this is the list of keywords from the last 1000 entries that got people coming to my website.

weird-keyword-searches-187x1000[Click to Enlarge]

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If you did scroll through the list, good for you. If you didn’t, congrats, because I wouldn’t either.

Haha.

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Anyway, these are the top 10 funny search terms from the list above.

#10. Incest Testimonials

Erm… What is an ‘Incest Testimonial’? LOL!

“Hi, I am living in an incestuous family. I like it and you should too!”

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#9. Booty Lotion

booty-lotion

For the best bootilicious experience~

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#8. KuKu

KuKuNehNeh! Someone searched for YOU! WAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

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#7. Pubic; Horny; Jurong

I am so bloody curious to what this guy/girl was searching for….

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#6. You Bith For My Pleasure

My WHAT for YOUR pleasure?

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#5. Women Measuring Dicks

Someone looking to hire a professional lady to measure a male genitalia I think. LOL

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#4. Sia Girlfriend Mustache

Someone has a VERY INTERESTING fetish.

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#3. Shower of Sperm

I am sorry if my site disappointed this person. I got no bukkake pics.

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#2. What to say to get horyn in cybersex

Try “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”. Guaranteed horYness.

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#1. Aunties Panties

I think the person who searched for #4 is looking for an attire for his mustached SIA girlfriend.

 

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4 Problems That Bloggers Face at Social Events

The soft launch for podfire.sg at Geek Terminal is my 1st ever ‘blogger social event’ that I ever attended. I will not write about the event itself as many have already covered it. Instead, I shall cover the 4 problems that bloggers might face at such social events.

After attending the event, I see some problems that bloggers might encounter, especially if they are new.

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#1. Hi! My name is……

At such events, there is a high chance that everyone you meet there owns at least ONE blog. Which means that everyone meeting anyone would be half expecting to associate people to their online names when they meet and greet. It becomes a problem when one is not as famous.

“Hi! My name is Kris!”

“Erm…….”

“Krisandro lar!”

“Er…….”

“krisandro of krisandro.com?”

“Eh……”

“The guy who got molested?”

“Dunno who. KThxBye!!!”

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#2. Your kickass nick is……

Mine is Krisandro. It is meant to be pronounced as kri-send-dro or kriS-send-dro. At that event, I see that people tend to drop the ‘Rs’ in my nick.

Some called, Kiss-send-dro!”

Some tried, “Kri-send-do!”

The worst did,Kiss-send-do!”

I should have called myself ‘i_love_69′ or something. Everyone will surely remember and know how to pronounce that for sure.

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#3. You remember some blogger for weird reasons……

There was a person who stumbled upon my blog when he/she looked up google and searched for ‘Peggy Heng Boobs’. Now, if you click the this link or go to google to search for the term I mentioned. You will most likely see that my blog is 1st on the search results. Click on that and you will find that the post wasn’t about Peggy’s boobs.

Imagine me with such a hilarious memory of her and seeing her in the flesh at that event. I restrained myself from talking to her as it could have went all wrong.

“Hey Peggy Heng right? You wanna hear something about your boobies?”

*SLAP!!!*

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#4. After taking pictures of the bloggers……

Many bloggers are snap-friendly-people which is the nicer term for cam-whores by the way. LOL. And after taking shit loads of pictures and knowing who is who, you might go home with a huge problem.

“Is this blogger in this pic the anonymous kind? Oh no. What about this guy? Or this girl? Er… shit! Will she be angry if I post her picture? DIE LAR! I NEED TO BLOG NOW! NO TIME TO ASK!!!”

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What to do? Krisandro tell you lor….

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Mosaic the whole lot lor.

mosaic-the-whole-lot
[Image from Ping.sg (Facebook Group)]

“I took peeeekture of all the bloggers! As yew can SEE, on the left is……..”

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Google Adsense, WTF?

After creating a testimonials page for my blog, I saw this ad appear on my sidebar.

google-adsense-wtf

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Google, is that what you really think of my blog?

LOL

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